July 6, 2007
My heart hurts right now...
My heart truly aches right now. Matt is still fishing and I'm browsing the boards over at DST, I came upon this thread (seriously it's long, but just pick a page toward the middle or end and scan it) http://www.digishoptalk.com/boards/showthread.php?t=64281 . I have never felt truly confindent in professing my faith, mostly because I am not great with words and am scared that someone will ask me a question and I will hesitate, mumble, jumble and just look stupid. I read the first 10 pages of this (or scanned) and my heart aches for these people. People who depend on themselves, refuse to belive in a God, believe in aliens above the father son and holy ghost. They blame life happenings or other things that just don't make sense to me. As I'm reading I'm thinking "But that's why I believe"! I'm so sad that all of these people are ok with choosing hell over eternal life with our Lord in heaven! I'll admid I'm scared of that day coming, I can't say that I'm so looking forward to Jesus return, but not because I don't know where I'm going, but because I'm comfortable here (even with all the trials and hardships we face daily), I love being with my kids, I want to meet this baby within me... don't get me wrong, I think heaven will be absolutely amazing, learning all the answers that we just don't know now, spending time with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (ok, so I'm getting close to tears here, all by myself). I think I'm actually ok with him returning b/c then I know that my children will be in heaven with me and not left here on this earth, but the fear of death is heavy on my heart. It's something I think about almost daily, because of risks and life experiences that are always on my mind, I don't want to leave my children... ok, truly in tears now, bearing to much of myself here, sorry, I've been rambling... my point was that I feel so bad for all of those who do not believe in God, the God that sent his son Jesus Christ to die for our sins.
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Oh wow! I have never even visited DST since I don't scrap, but I visited it to read all 11 pages of the debate that you referred to. How sad is Carin's story???? It is so hard to convey how good God's love is on a platform like that. It is too bad that so many of those girls have had negative experiences with Christians that make them skeptical. One thread I did notice was how many of them seemed to WANT to believe, but don't for some reason. I have to believe that God is working in them making them have that desire. The ones that claim they are Wiccan or some other witchlike/alien-believing religion must be far from God. We can pray that they will somehow be touched by God so that they have no doubt that He is real! I know what you mean about Jesus returning- I love my kids and family so much that it is scary to think about going to heaven, but really, if we love our kids beyond any comprehension, think about what heaven has in store for us- it is beyond our comprehension as well, but will be even better!!!!! I appreciate your link and post- you are a brave person and you gave me some things to think about that will only strengthen my faith.
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