First of all, I have to announce that I finally joined Team Bell! and I would love it if you joined as well. I will more than likely be walking the 5k (my goal would be to run it, but I don't think that will happen, who knows though), I'm hoping to convince my husband and kids to do it as well! So, join us, let's get the biggest team out there! Sarah is arranging to t-shirts for our team as well, more info soon on that I'm sure (maybe as a guest blogger, who knows! ;)
Second, we had a great sermon on friendship today at church (which will soon be available here), it ended with this song, which I'm sure we are all to familiar with from our younger days... (did I just say that???)
Sometime in our lives we all have pain (Ummmm, now)
We all have sorrow
But if we are wise we know that there's
Always tomorrow
Lean on me when you're not strong and
I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long till I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on
Please swallow your pride if I have things
You need to borrow
For no one can fill those of your needs
that you won't let show
Just call on me brother when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'd understand
We all need somebody to lean on
Lean on me when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long till 'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on
Just call on me brother when you need a hand
We all need somebody to lean on
I just might have a problem that you'd understand
We all need somebody to lean on
If there is a load you have to bear
That you can't carry
I'm right up the road, I'll share your load
if you just call me
Just call me when you need a friend
Just call me when you need a friend...
I appreciate all of my friends (both new and old) that have been this song for me. Someone to lean on! You have all been AMAZING! So, once again, as I was listening to this song I remembered how lucky I was and the tears welled up, like I said, AGAIN! It seems to happen every Sunday because of something said, a prayer said (I'm getting used to hearing my name now though), or a song sang. It is such a good feeling to be surrounded by wonderful Christians, some of which I know are praying for me on a regular basis!
Third(ly): I start chemo Tuesday. It's a start of an ending. An ending of cancer occupying my body. Yup, cuz I'm gonna win this battle! So, bye bye cancer, I won't miss you, you were never welcome here, you just need to leave. NOW! (b/c if you leave NOW I could just skip chemo and wouldn't that be better for all of us???) Just kidding, so far I do not know what to expect, and that's ok, it's probably better for me, I'm not that nervous (yet, although I'm going to assume that that will all change tomorrow sometime). I'm not sure how this whole port thing works, I know to apply EMLA cream, but to be quite honest, it's still an open wound, will it hurt if I do that? Where exactly do I apply the cream? Will I feel the drugs being pumped into my body? Will I be tired? Will I be foggy? Will I get nauseous? Questions, Questions and more questions, some of them questions that no one can answer for me because it's all based on my body, my dose of drugs, my reaction, so we wait. We wait and see. I'm still keeping on keeping on though. I plan to attend Landon's choir concert Wednesday night, I plan to attend Landon's baseball game Friday night. We have nothing planned all weekend which may be a good thing, but WHO KNOWS. HE knows, that's who. And He will care for me, He will protect me, I will lean on Him!
Fourth(ly): My hair will be falling out approximately 14 days after starting chemo. I'm not sure that I can deal with watching it fall out by the handful, so I'm deciding what I want to do about that. Do I want to wait until it starts and then shave it off or do I want total control of that situation and just shave it myself before that all starts? I'm thinking the latter. Control. Something I really really like (although I'm learning more and more that my controlling things doesn't make it better, but allowing God to control sure does make things better, although not always easier). So, I'm thinking a head shaving party may be in order... anyone want to join me? I'm hoping to convince Landon to join me, Matt will easily join me (the others are out, I just won't let it happen). Maybe some pizza, pop and razors! Wouldn't that be fun? Seriously. I think it would be easier if I did it with friends than by myself, I'm more likely to make it fun and funny than sad and devastating. Let me know, either comment or email me. Let's make it a BIG party!
Fifth(ly): Goodnight! Sleep tight! I won't, but you definately should!
Sixth(ly): (at 4:58 in the morning of course) I am going to start walkling more. Hopefully every day. Because I hear it helps with effects of chemo, but it will be hard for me to do alone, Julie has graciously offered to walk with me a couple of days a week but I need others to keep me accountable as well, so if ever you feel like walking (hopefully 2 miles or so to start) please feel free to contact me. Right now I don't dare make any definate plans b/c of the unknown effects of treatment so it's not something I want to schedule or anything, but please just think of me if you are wanting to walk!
3 comments:
Good Morning lynette:) I can't believe how often your writing echos my/our (Jeff and I) thoughts and feelings! I too get the control thing (posted about that a week or so ago!) I also went through a phase where tears just seemed to be right there and ready to flow-not always for "bad" things, good as well, memories, a song etc. That has been better lately so, not sure if it's a time frame thing a or what? Your haircut is just so cute! You have been very much on my mind and in my prayers! I will be thinking of you tomorrow especially-many prayers for all to go well! Jeff was told that these days there should be no reason to feel sick and if he did to tell them right away and they would change some meds up. He has had a great response to his chemo, which I know is different for everyone but, I am praying your response is awesome as well! Been praying for good results for the pet scan as well!!! We are off to U of M in a few minutes, big day there: labs for an hour or so and then meeting is transplant Doctor and the team for about 2 hours after that. Possibly meeting with insurance personal and financial planning too! We are preparing to be overwhelmed! I am going in prepared tho, have my big green notebook for notes and a digital voice recorder to be sure we don't miss or misunderstand something! I want to make sure I communicate the correct info on Jeff's care pages when I update! I'll be thinking of you...Brenda
Lynette! You are constantly in my family's prayers! And because of reading your blog, I have made the decision that at the end of the summer I am going to cut off my hair for Locks of Love. I've never had a "short" haircut before, but your posts have inspired me to give. We've ALWAYS given to the American Cancer Society since Cort's dad died of lung cancer 5 years ago, but I want to do more--for women with cancer (Recently a high school friend of mine lost his mom to the cancer battle). So this is going to be my way to start--and hopefully there will be more opportunities for me to give soon too! You're faith is so strong and you are so brave--you are an inspiration!
Lynette, I hope you get some rest today in preperation for tomorrow. I'm praying that all goes well and you can put this all behind you. Take Care, Kerri Arendsen
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