January 14, 2009

Slap in the face...

Conviction is like a slap in the face! I have to say that everywhere I turn lately I feel like I'm being convicted regarding SOMETHING in my life!

Monday's BSF was very convicting for me... we are called to be the best at the job that God calls us to. I know that at this point in my life one of the jobs that he is calling me to is to be a mom. I know that I'm a good mom, but I'm not being the best mom that I can be. If we don't do our job according to his standards we may as well not do the job, there will be no difference on judgement day. Some changes need to be made! But they aren't easy changes for me, I rebel against these changes. But they must be made!

And, yesterday I read this post on MeRa's website... and then today this one... and have been so inspired! I'm going to full on go for it... hopefully today or tomorow I will be able to purchase a website (a REAL one) and get that set up, and I'll be ready to start shooting as soon as I recover from a c-section (or before the c-section too)! I excited for this... I'm excited to finally be able to do it, to feel confident enough to do it (ok, the journey to confidence is a road I'm traveling, but I WILL get there)!

Off to get my teeth brushed, Elliot and I spent a good deal of the morning snuggling/sleeping in bed and now we are getting a very late start on my list of thigns to do (specifically mop the entire wood floor on my hands and knees... want to help???).

Oh, and a quick update... Landon had a rough night Sunday night after returning from Great Wolf w/o Dex, I think it finally hit him, but he's been ok since then! I really thought that elliot wouldn't ever say anything, out of sight out of mind type of thing... no such luck! Yesterday he kept asking where his Dexy was, ALL DAY LONG... broke my heart!


Beck said...

Aw, so sad to have to explain such hard parts of life to your little ones. :(

On a brighter note, I'm so excited for YOU and US in a photography endeavor! We must put our heads together over coffee next week. What day works best for you?

Bethany said...

Good for you!!
I would have to say I have lost my drive towards photography as a business. I'm not sure of all the reasons but I know part of it has to do with feeling as if there is so much competition-which I hate. The first article you linked to was interesting.
Another part may be the below zero wind chill. :)

Kristen said...

Interesting the convicting segment... our message on Sunday was from Dan Seaborn... about family, etc. I don't know your feelings exactly on the mom thing, but I know I had a stirring last Sunday too. I'll pray for you if you pray for me. :) So sorry about L & E with Dex.. it must be so hard. Give E a babywipe and let him mop the floor. LOL Take care!

S Huiz said...

I think you are a pretty darn good mom! Your kids are happy, healthy and so fun to be around- definitely a product of good mothering!!!!!

Kari said...

Such a tough thing to watch your kids go through- if it didn't bother them at all I would be a little concerned!
I know what you mean about the conviction. It's definitely there so we don't go astray. Thankfully. You are a great mom and it definitely shines through your kids.